Daniel Dominguez
A shake weight can be pretty embarrassing to use. Because it looks like you're firetrucking your own face when you use it. But there are more uses for a shake weight that just firetrucking your own face to get your arms in shape. Here are some of the them:
Saving someone from falling off a cliff
Stopping a robbery
Putting out a fire
Getting a baby to sleep
Fighting a werewolf
Helping someone with car trouble
Feeding a poor family
Whatever this Michael Jackson fan is doing (I don't know what he is doing)
Rescuing a cat from a tree
Freeing Mumia Abu Jamal
To complete a dinosaur skeleton
Brushing a hot chick's teeth
A replacement Oscar for when they run out
As Lil' Wayne's lawyer
Killing a bat while wearing a bikini top
Preventing Saw VII from ever being made
Judging American Idol
Judging Amy
As a stand in for Al Gore at press conferences
Giving Jim Cramer more crap that's distracting to do
What else do you use your shake weight for?
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