Every year it's the same thing... I mean to get my dad a gift, but something always happens and then it's Father's Day and I have nothing... not even an excuse.
Well NOT THIS YEAR! This year I'm going to give my dad the gift that every dad looks forward to... a good excuse.
Thought I'd share them with you!
10. Someone Stole My Identity
I dentity theft is on the rise. People charging up large amounts and emptying bank accounts. Those criminals not only ruined my life, they ruined father's day! (You gotta really sell this one, be outraged!)
9. I Donated Money To A Charity In Your Name
Knowing that he's got such a thoughtful kid will ease the pain of not getting what he really wanted.
8. In Light Of Our Nations Economic Situation An Extravagant Gift Would Be In Poor Taste
We are in the Middle of the worst recession we will probably see in our lifetimes. How can you think of Father's Day gifts when people are losing their homes?
7. Father's Day Cupon
This is essentially as good as giving nothing since you will probably never deliver on the goods anyway.
6. I'm Still Mad At You About Something From My Childhood
You don't ever have to tell him what it is. It may be nothing. That's privledged information. Just let him know that you're talking to your therapist about it and that you're sure you'll get over it with time, but that you just didn't feel like shopping for him.
5. I Didn't Have Any Homework So The Dog Ate Your Gift
Depends, might work if your have one of those dogs that actually chews up your belongings. Like I do!
4. I'm Broke
Can't argue with that. It's like he knows that if you had a job you'd get him something awesome... but you don't so hopefully it's going to be the thought that counts.
3. What Can You Get For A Man Who Already Has Everything?
This is what you say to your dad. It's a great one because you're flaking out but complimenting him at the same time. He wants gifts, but who doesn't want to be a man who has everything? Then you could always thrown in a 10 minute back scratch or something to really sell the excuse.
2. I Didn't Get Mom Anything For Mother's Day Either
This might make him feel better. At least it's just your total and complete laziness and nothing personal.
1. I'm Going Green This Year
You're not cheap or lazy... you're trying to save the planet!
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