Distracted Driving

Andrew Gupton

In an age of multi-tasking, it seems that more often than not we find ourselves distracted when behind the wheel. Not only is this dangerous, but inconvenient because people are getting lost.

 

The most obvious distraction is text messaging, which has inspired a campaign to get people to stop texting and driving. If you really need to speak to someone that badly, you might as well rock the futuristic Bluetooth headset. It may look funny, but you’ll live long and prosper.

 

So it got me thinking, while texting and driving is bad, what about all the other crazy stuff we do while driving.

 

Listening To A Captivating Book-on-Tape

Sure, My Sister’s Keeper narrated by Morgan Freeman is moving, but not during drive time. Save it for the treadmill.

 

Juggling

Just because you drive a clown car, doesn’t make you a clown.

 

Jamming With The FreeCreditReport.com Band

Not smart! How’d they all fit in that car anyway? Call me if they cover “Free Bird”.

 

Doing A Richard Simmons Workout

There’s nothing wrong with Sweating to the Oldies, but if anyone ever saw you…How embarrassing.

 

Having A Light-Saber Battle With Yoda

I don’t care how strong the force may be with you. How would you explain it to a cop? Not to mention Yoda’s outstanding warrants…

 

Finding Jesus

To each their own as far as religion is concerned, but c’mon, get some Velcro and keep Christ on the dash!

 

Combing Seth Rogen’s Hair

Yeah, that’s a job for two hands…

 

Lighting Farts Aflame

I guess you could say he’s really got his foot on the gas… but seriously, that’s not even something I recommend doing outside of a moving vehicle.

 

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