Prince Declares The Internet Dead

ThatJerkDan

Eccentric and enigmatic singer Prince has declared that the Internet is completely over.

 

 

“The internet's like MTV. At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated. Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good,” the singer recently told the UK’s Daily Mirror newspaper.

 

 

Yep, that’s right, the Internet, computers and all digital gadgets are no good.

And Prince should know. He’s always ahead of the curve when it comes to trends and fashions.

Here are some other fads that Prince was the first to adopt and then abandon before any of us even knew they weren’t cool anymore.

 

 

Remember when we were all wearing purple jackets and white frilly shirts all the time. And then Prince told us it wasn’t cool so we stopped.

 

 

So then we all started wearing just the white frilly shirts, buttoning only the bottom button at our waist and carrying around flowers to hand to anyone who asked, “Hey, weren’t you wearing a jacket? Why is your shirt all open like that?”

 

 

And then remember when we all started licking our fingers all the time because we thought it was sexy. But then Prince told us to stop because we could get catch the bird flu or something worse from putting our dirty hands in our mouths.

 

 

 

And then Prince said, “Everybody’s texting me too much and running up the bill on my data plan. I’m changing my name to a symbol so nobody can dial it and bug me.”

 

 

And remember when Prince had that guitar made in the shape of the symbol for his name, and played it at the Super Bowl? Too bad he couldn't hear very well.

Now Prince is telling us that the internet isn't cool.

 

 

Yep, that’s Prince for you. Always ahead of the curve when it comes to what’s hip and what’s not. He leaves the rest of us standing in the wake of his Purple Rain wondering “What’s next?”

 

 

R.I.P. Internet. The Purple One has spoken.

 

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