If I were a wizard like Harry Potter, and I am not saying that I am not one...
Here are the first ten spells I would cast.
The Spell of Perpetual Hair
I miss my hair and wish it would return. I wouldn't want long hippie hair, no, a nice Alec Baldwin would be great.
The Spell of Social Graces
I am, admittedly, a social retard. Maybe a little suave James Bond-like spell might help me out.
The Spell of Color Coordination
I learned that cowboy boots don't go with shorts and a sweater. I learned the hard way.
The Spell of Anti Road Rage
I hate traffic as signified by the fact that I can't get home from anywhere without flipping the bird at least 5 times.
The Spell of Growing Up
When you pass 30 ones love of cap guns and couch cushion forts is viewed, by most, as just creepy.
The Spell of Being Organized
I just want one day that sees me not shaving, calling in late to work and tying my shoes at the same time as I merge onto the freeway.
The Spell of Puppies
No personality flaw here to fix. I just want 20 or puppies around me at all times. I like puppies!
The Spell of Not Getting Kicked in the Groin
It never fails, at every family function there is always a child that kicks or punches me in the daddy parts. I have 4 siblings with 3 kids each so I guess the odds are against me.
The Spell of Not Getting Tasered
Well this one may be my fault. Here is a pro-tip for you all, never compliment a cops gun then ask him if they make the same model for men.
What spells would you cast? Let us know in the comments!
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