I don't have an iPhone as I have a huge issue with Apple not using flash for the sole purpose of tying users to their platform. However, putting my nerd rage aside I must admit that I am intreauged with the idea that Apple has thousands of apps that there users can buy. Here are a few that I would like to see.
The “Your Fly Is Open” App
I furtively check my zipper 5 times per day in fear that I have left the barn door open. In my world, there would be an app for that.
The “You Are Not That Funny” App
I think that my jokes are the funniest things ever and that they must be shared as I am a genius. Judging by the wild eye rolls of my friends and family there is evidence to dispute that claim.
The “She's Just Not That Into You” App
I have a hard time reading women's social cues. If I muster the courage to flirt with a girl, I just power through the flirting without regard to the response. This app would help guys like me to stop wasting our time.
The “Step Away From The Computer” App
Some days I never go outside, sad to say but it is true. I need an app that goes off until the phone gets 20 minutes of sunlight. Come to think of it... I would probably just end up throwing the iPhone in the backyard for 20 minutes a day to get the alarm to shut off, but at least I'd have to go out into the sun to get my phone back so that's something.
The “Cook Just Spit In Your Food” App
I am notorious for sending food back to be prepared the way that I ordered it. I think that an app that calculates the odds of the cook spitting in my food based upon how much more work that he has to do would be fantastic, and probably lead to a lot more meals being cooked at home.
The “Stranger Danger Countdown Clock” App
I always wave or smile at little babies when they wave or talk to me in the line at the store or out in public. I am sure that this is fine for a couple or a woman to do... But when a guy like me... in his 30's with a shaved head and a neck-beard does this, the security guys start to walk my way. I get away with the first “hello,” but that's when the mom usually gets creeped out.
The “I Heart The Colorblind” App
I am colorblind, and that combined with no fashion sense has led me to wear some pretty funky outfits. I would love an app that looks at your clothing and makes sure everything matches.
The "Shut Up!" App
Oh wait. They've already invented that one...
What apps would you like to see for the iPhone?
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