Even though fashion is forever evolving, some weird trend from the past always seems to resurface, like leg warmers or stretch pants. We're worried that the trends we murdered in the 80s and 90s will come back, almost as if they were buried in a Pet Semetery. Please, let’s all work together to make sure these terrible fashion crimes stay dead and buried.
1. Dickies
In case you don’t know what a dickie is, it’s a high-necked bib you wear under your shirt to make it look like you’re wearing a turtleneck. We don’t know why anyone would want to look like they’re wearing a turtleneck, unless trying to cover up major hickeys in the middle of summer. Hey, wouldn’t a dickey look AWESOME with a tank top?
2. Scrunchies
Scrunchies are fugly. Unless you have long bushy curls, your hair is going to look like crap. The only time scrunchies are cute is when they’re on yappy little dogs.
3. Hammer Pants
MC Hammer, why did you do this to America? We’ve never been able to figure out what Hammer was carrying in that pouch, but our best guess is water balloons or eels.
4. Muffin Tops
Girls, we have news for you. Wearing your pants two sizes too small does not make you look sexy. It makes you look fat, even when you’re skinny. Especially bad is when you sport a muffin top while wearing a cropped top. Guys do not like to see a roll of fat or loose skin spilling out of the top of your pants.
5. Suspenders
Not even Urkel could make suspenders cool.
6. Gold Lame Leisure Suits
Elvis, we love you… But look what you paved the way for …
7. Crocs
Crocs are so firetrucking hideous. Even when you bling them out with puffy stickers, they still look like something old ladies wear when they’re gardening. Plus, people can smell your rancid feet and see your weird foot moles.
8. Stupid Hair On Men
No, you do not look alternative or edgy or cool. You look stupid. Seriously.
Men have been afflicted with the Stupid Hair Syndrome since the 80s, when Flock of Seagulls started the trend.
And then this happened to Poison. Please! Stop the madness!
Crap, too late…
9. Gangsta Jeans
Hey boys, wearing your pants dangling from your skinny ass does not make you look like a gangsta. It makes you look like a freaking idiot. No one wants to see your skanky man panties. Put those things away!
10. Thong Bikinis On Men
Thongs on women are hot.
Thongs on men are not.
They don’t work for rhinoceroses (rhinocerii?) either.
What are some trends you’d like to see die and never come back? Tell us in the comments!
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