How to Make Facebook Friends

Danny Licht

Between futile feuds and common misunderstandings, real friendships can be rough. The invention of social networking has made having countless and long-distance friendships much easier, making real friendships nonessential. However, the problem with cyber-friendships is the urge to have more 'friends'. But have no fear, these fool-proof tips are here to help.

 

 

One of the best ways to make Facebook friends is to always accept the pretend porn stars' friend requests. Seize the opportunity to make a new friend. So what if it's just some lonely, middle-aged man? Everyone needs a Facebook friend.

 

 

Next, be sure to tell everyone what you're doing at every moment, whether it’s through mobile uploads, status updates, or location 'check-ins'. Or all three. Furthermore, people love when statuses are sentences, or even paragraphs, long.

 

 

If you have special feelings for a special someone, the best way to show your affection is by 'liking' everything on their profile. This will let them know not only that that you like them, but also will make them think that you have common interests.

 

 

Afterwards, comment on everyone's profile pictures, whether you know them personally or not. This will bring you to be real friends with Facebook friends. Tell them popular comments such as "Stop being so gorgeous!" This is a great way to get everyone to like you.

 

 

A very underestimated Facebook feature is the 'poking' functionality. A great way to tell people that you wish you knew them better is to poke them. For example, you see a really hot girl but don't want to confuse her with words, poking will solve all your problems. It implies, "Hey, I like you. Let's get to know each other better."

 

 

Another method I like to use is, what I call, "frienzing", or a friend frenzy. It's really easy. All that you need to do is go on a friend's profile, comment on everything, and like every comment. This way, hopefully, another nice person looking to make friends (just like you) will friend request you. Frienzing is all the fun of finding new Facebook friends without seeming creepy.

 

 

Finally, if all else fails, search your favorite name and friend request at minimum twenty people with this name. Chances are, at least one of them will be friendly, too, and accept your friendship. Also, it helps to white-lie to them with messages such as, "Remember me? From preschool?" or, more vaguely, "It's been so long!" And just like that, you're on your way to becoming a Facebook-friendzillionaire.

What are your tricks for making friends on Facebook? Tell us in the comments below!

 

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