Ah yes, Oscar Season is upon us and with that comes a flurry of questions: What will the young attractive female nominees be wearing? Who will attend the festivities with whom? And the most important question of all, how high will the bar be set due to sheer physical attractiveness contained in a single location? Here are the 10 sexiest actors nominated for Oscars this year.
10. Jeremy Renner - Best Supporting Actor, The Town
Jeremy Renner is one sexy bank robber in The Town. Before deciding to explore the world of theatre, Jeremy studied computer science, psychology, and criminology. He would have been the sexiest criminologist in town.
9. Hailee Steinfeld - Best Supporting Actress, True Grit
Can you imagine being nominated for an Academy Award at the age of 14? Not to mention she's nominated for the only feature length film she's ever even been in. She's hot stuff to boot. I'm sure we'll hear more from her in the future.
8. Jesse Eisenberg – Best Actor, The Social Network
A watered-down Michael Cera impostor this actor is not. Jesse lights up the screen in The Social Network through his terrifyingly focused confidence, he represents the kind of bad boy who can also re-upholster the inside of your computer. Which is great, considering I also like my sexy bad boys to be productive.
7. Michelle Williams – Best Actress, Blue Valentine
Michelle is an example of one of those incredibly frustrating people on this earth who can wear no make-up, a shabby tee and a pair of jeans and still glow with the polish of an A-list star. She’s one of those people you want to hate, but can’t help but love.
6. Mark Ruffalo – Best Supporting Actor, The Kids Are Alright
Look. I know. He’s an older man. But there’s years of physically attractive prowess tracked in those wrinkles. Young cute boys, take note. This is what you should aim to look like when you reach full-fledged adulthood.
5. Amy Adams – Best Supporting Actress, The Fighter
Here’s a lady who can float with the royal ease of a true Disney Princess in one movie, and rumble with the most ruthless city-dwellers in the next. I all at once want her as my bodyguard and my best friend.
4. Javier Bardem – Best Actor, Biutiful
Javier Bardem invented sexy. Well, it was a collaboration with Antonio Banderas. If I was a member of the Academy I would vote for him for the sake of future male generations benefiting by his sexy example.
3. Jennifer Lawrence – Best Supporting Actress, Winter’s Bone
One of the greatest things about the Oscars is the consistent singling out of a relatively unknown actor under the age of 21. This person, more often than not has more poise and sophistication than most of their elders, Jennifer has all that. Oh yeah, and she’s breathtakingly beautiful too. That helps.
2. James Franco - Best Actor, 127 Hours
Due to his highly productive work ethic, I am confident that in the future, 75% of the movies in theaters will have been touched by Franco at some point or another. I pray to God that that also means he’ll star in them too.
1. Natalie Portman – Best Actress, Black Swan
Natalie Portman is the Audrey Hepburn/Natalie Wood/Fill-in-the-Blank-of-Someone-Deemed-a-‘Hollywood-Legend’ of our generation. Her sex appeal unravels in a style both intense, aggressive, and yet demure. When she’s lifted up as one of the greatest actors of our generation, I can’t promise I won’t be sitting smug saying, “I told you so.”
Who should win the Oscar for Sexiest actor alive? Let us know in the comments below.
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