Having been stripped of his powers and cast from the realm of Asgard, Thor, former Thunder God, has a little bit of catching up to do when it comes to understanding us and our way of life. Like a newborn baby he is, and like a new born baby there are some places you simply cannot take him if you want to have a good time or get anything done.
1. City Zoo
It's hard to explain to the curator why your friend is releasing all the animals, but Thor believes that wild beasts, gifts from his father the great and good god Odin, must roam free.
2. Family reunions
Don't bring Thor along as a guest to your family reunion. First of all, he's going to talk about HIS family, which is hard to beat as they are Norse gods. But then, when the alcohol starts flowing, and he sees you having such a great time with your family, he starts crying and talking about the banishment. ALWAYS WITH THE BANISHMENT.
3. Construction Sites
Thor wields the mighty hammer Mjolnir, the very source of his power. That's going to make all the construction workers, with their small human hammers, feel inadequate.
4. Concerts
It's hard for Thor to relax and just enjoy the show. He's always wondering when the next band is going to start, if you left the sunroof open, whether or not his brother and arch-nemesis Loki, God of Mischief, is planning to reignite war with the Frost Giants, and so on.
5. Church
No matter what your religion is, Thor hates it. He finds it to be a lie against his father, the great and good god Odin. And while he's pretty good about being quiet when you tell him to be, his pure, unbridled rage does cause him to get kind of fidgety.
6. The Opera
A lot of operas involve costumes similar to what the great Norse gods wear, and as such, Thor has trouble distinguishing reality from the show and will attempt to intervene in the narrative. The number of operatic singers smashed by the hammer Mjolnir is, frankly, too high.
7. Gamestop
Thor totally believes it when the guy at Gamestop says you need to preorder LA Noir to get it on launch day. Thor, they always have like a hundred copies on the day games come out!
8. Your Networking Group
Unfortunately, Thor is the kind of guy who corners people at networking events and talks on and on about the same topic. "No, Thor, I don't know anything about ways to trap and contain the mythical god of mischief. I sell lightbulb to owners of commercial properties."
Is there anywhere else you'd be uncomfortable taking the mighty Thor? Let us know in the comments!
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