Your Dad has always been there for you. He's taken you to soccer practice, put band aids on your cut, helped you with your homework. And now it's Father's Day and you want to repay him for all that he's done. Below you'll find a list of gifts you definitely don't want to get him if you want him to still love you afterward.
A Crappy Tie
Dads hate nothing more than getting another damn tie on Father's Day. Crappy functional gifts like ties and socks bum everyone out. You can do better than that.
Cologne Some Guy Is Selling Out Of The Back Of His Van
If you're going to get your Dad cologne, get him cologne you know he likes. Don't try to "get creative with it." Unless you want him to end of in the hospital with a huge rash and covered in the smell of uncooked foreign fish.
A Handful Of Flies
Very few Dads like getting a big handful of flies for Father's Day, yet it's one of the most popular gifts given to fathers on Father's Day. But just because something's popular guys, doesn't mean it's a good idea.
Whatever You Don't Finish Eating
Definitely put more thought into your gift than just wrapping whatever you didn't finish that morning and giving it to your father. He's going to be able to tell you didn't just go out and buy him a half eaten sandwich with a few bites already taken out of it, trust me. UNLESS your dad specifically requests some almost finished food for father's day this gift is a big no no.
A Baby Wrapped In An American Flag
Your dad already has enough responsibility to deal with raising you, the last thing he needs is another overly patriotic mouth to feed. Plus if the baby defecates on the flag then he'll get arrested for desecrating the flag and go to jail. And then he'll be spending father's day in jail with a flag covered in baby feces, and a baby.
An Arch Nemesis
Come on man, your dad trudges to the office nine hours a day and then drives home in bumper to bumper traffic to hang out with you for a little while and then crash into bed for another grueling day at the office, the last thing he needs is an evil super villain emperor whom he is destined to one day do battle with for the fate of all mankind. He's got enough on his plate, alright?
Daniel Tosh For A Day
Dads hate getting Daniel Tosh for a day as a gift. Then he's got to spend the whole Father's Day having Daniel Tosh following him around making jokes at his expense and hurting his feelings. Dads like their feelings not to be hurt, it's just the way dads are.
A Dad
Your Dad doesn't need to have a Dad being his Dad. He's Dad age, so he can take care of himself. So, seriously, stop getting your Dad Dads.
What do you plan on getting your dad for Father's Day? Let us know in the comments!
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