The new Captain America movie is coming out soon, but who cares, because Batman is far superior! Here’s why.
1. His Suit Is Way More Butch
Batman is super stealthy in his all-black suit, while Captain America looks like the Fourth of July threw up on him. I mean, they're both tight (in the literal sense of the word) as hell.
2. He Has Really Awesome Horns
I mean, look at them! Sure, Captain America has horns as well, but they’re devil horns and stupid.
3. Batman Movies Are Directed By Christopher Nolan
He's basically the best person in the whole world. Tim Burton is another former Batman director. Who's Captain America directed by? Joe Shmo. I mean Johnston. Pff.
4. Morgan Freeman Works For Batman
I just wish Morgan Freeman could narrate my life, and everything in general. So having Freeman is always a win.
5. Batman Has A Really Cool Car
He's dark as the night. He's the... the... the... oh yeah, Dark Knight. Captain America doesn't even have a pimped out Rascal Scooter.
6. Batman Is Really, Really Rich
He funded his entire everything! And he's smart! And he's Batman! And Captain America is probably still trying to get out of the recession.
7. He Has An Awesome Searchlight
Look at it go! I want one!
Who's better, Batman or Captain America? Tell us in the comments below!
Comments
Post a Comment