It's not just 'FIRST!' comments that need to go—there are so, so many more than I can live without! Here are the top eight types of Facebook comments that need to go die in a fire.
The Clueless
They will ask you where you are in a photo of you standing in front of the STATUE OF LIBERTY. They will ask you who RIP Amy Winehouse is. And they will follow every dumb thing they say with an LOL. Yes, there are no dumb questions, only dumb people...people who need to, at the very least, learn how to use Google.
The Activist Rant
Mention you are engaged and amongst all the well-wishers there will be that one person who gives you a blood diamond lecture. Hello? We all listen to Kanye, fool! These are the same people who change their status update to fight cancer. Cancer's all like "Come at me, bro! Your update ain't no match for my rapid and destructive ability to spread"! I like to imagine their suffering every time they eat wheat protein 'bacon.'
The Competitive Poor Me!
If you ever dare mention the bad day you're having, this person will be there to tell you about the minor fender bender they had that morning and the ingrown hair they had that is now a painfully infected zit. You can never win. Just let them be the bigger loser if they want it so bad.
The Pearl Clutcher
If you don't think it's appropriate to mock someone for his constant fapping, then log off and go watch your Seventh Heaven DVD collection! Personally, I adore people calling your son Hand-o Calrissian.
Positive Yet Ultimately Meaningless
These people comment on everything, but say nothing. Everything you post is just an opportunity for them to write LOL or ILYxoxo. Once in awhile they get creative and do a ROTFLMAO. At first, you'll think you are the most amusing and beloved person on Facebook. Then you'll see they do it to everyone. That's when it becomes annoying.
Creeper
This person is just waiting to turn the most innocent thing you say into something dirty. Ask if it's safe to download a zip file, he'll respond with something like, "It's safe to download my zip file! Are you sure you have enough room on your c-drive?" Screen-cap the convo and send it to his pearl clutching mama.
Grammar Police
YES...certain people deserve to be called out...so save it for them. I know the difference between your and you're. I made a frickin' typo! Plus your being a jerk! Theirs more to life then proper grammer and spelling! SRSLY!
Get A Private Message!
One minute you're having an interesting discussion about the debt crisis resolution (it could happen!) The next thing you know, two of your friends are getting their mack on. Cut to relationship status changes and annoying photos of their adorable baby pooping on the floor. See how annoying comments can get out of hand?
What kinds of things do you want banned from Facebook? Let us know in the comments so we stop doing it!
Check Out 8 Types Of Facebook Friends you Should Unfriend Immediately!
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