Sharks are cool, and sharks are in, but they’re not 'in' in a good way. Really mean people at really mean places, and I’m not going to point fingers Discovery Channel, put them in the completely wrong light. Sure their teeth are scary, and Jaws has pretty much traumatized generations of people, but sharks are really wonderful creatures. Let me tell you why.
There Are 350 Different Kinds!
I mean, come on, that’s incredible. I only know of two kinds of people. No, three actually. (I forgot about Dupree.)
They Only Kill Five To Ten People Per Year!
Would you just take a look at that number. That’s so low. So, so low. I have friends who’ve done more than that.
Eating Their Flesh Is Forbidden On Fiji
Sure, this one is devastating because, I mean, what other reason is there to go to Fiji? However, it shows that this people has great admiration (or probably just intense superstitious fear) for these beautiful, beautiful creatures.
Would You Just Look At That Face?
How could you not love a gal with a face like that?
Millions Are Killed Each Year
This, my dear, dear friend, is a true travesty. It is our duty as citizens of the universe to drastically reduce our usage of shark products (meat and milk). This is just tremendously sad. I’m crying.
Sharks Can Smell From Up To A Mile Away
This is really cool. Look at that ridiculous tourist who has to go right up to the flower to smell it. (I, however, can smell the flower from here.)
Some Can Grow Up To 14 Meters Long
That's like really, really big, in non-metric.
Their Good Work Keeps You Safe And Sound, Jimmy
You know what they say: An apple a day keeps the shark away!
On a scale from one to Tiger Woods, how big is your love (for sharks)? Let us know in the comments!
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