Very Best Of FMyLife: Halloween Edition

FMyLife

Halloween is a fun time to dress up like the dark lord and eat Fun Size Snickers in his honor, but Halloween can just as easily make you say F My Life! That's where FMylife comes in, collecting the worst moments of our lives, all in one place. Here are some of the best Halloween related FML moments this week!

 

Ghosts Hate Urine, So You're Safe Now

Today, I went to a haunted show restaurant. I needed the toilet badly, but they were inside the building, which could only be gotten to via a ghost train. The footage of me peeing myself in terror on the train was played on a big screen inside, in front of a crowd of onlookers. FML

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What Did His Ghost Costume Look Like?

Today, my mom toldme I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say"Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She thenwinked. I am now scarred for life. FML

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Yeah You Suck

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

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Lucky You Didn't Put That On Your Resume

Today, I was talking to my boss about her children. She told me she didn’t want them todevelop any problems by letting them sleep with the light on. I didn’t tell her last night I slept with the light on because I’m scared ofghosts. FML

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So You Saved Money!

Today, I was surfing the web for Halloween costumes, and found one labeled "Extreme Girl Nerd". With the wig, the glasses, and the buck-teeth, it looked exactly like me. FML

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How. Dare. You.

Today, at a party I told this guy that I really liked his pirate costume. Turns out he wasn't wearing a costume, his eye was shot out with a bebe gun. This explains the eye patch. FML

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Oh, So That Was You

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

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He's Still The Man You Knew

Today, I went on adate with a man I met on Halloween. It appears that his mullet wasn'tactually part of his costume. FML

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Good Of Them To Play Dead Like That

Today, I took a box of Halloween decorations down from the attic. Inside, were a bunch of fake spiders. I emptied the box onto the floor and the "fake" spiders crawled all over the living room in oppositedirections. FML

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It's Crazy That You Can't Get Rid Of It

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

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