Action figures are an integral part of childhood playtime. I'll admit to playing with some back in the day. Heck, some kids never grow out of them and become obsessive adult nerd collectors. So there are a lot of action figures out there! And a lot of them are ridiculous. Here's my list of some of the most WTF action figures out there.
Rappin' Mike
There is one tried and true method to get people to buy more action figures and that's to come out with novelty versions of popular figures. They pretty much always suck. Take this absurd TMNT novelty Michelangelo. I mean, the microphone nunchucks are pretty cool, but why'd he have to crib Flava Flav's trademark clock? Rappin' Mike looks more Turtle Ice than Turtle-Pac.
Crazy Cat Lady
I guess it's too difficult to play with a Forever Alone head? I'm really hoping the accessories include a hoarder house full of cat skeletons, fifty containers of expired cottage cheese that she bought on sale, and a few pounds of cat turds in various stages from fresh to fossilized.
Adolf Hitler
I know your Barbie's really into bad boys...but seriously? Isn't there like a Charlie Sheen action figure she can get with?
Beach Spider-Man
Actually, the whole line of Spider-Man action figures are STUPID AS HELL! Safari Spider-Man? Firefighter Spider-Man? But Beach Spider-Man has got to be the dumbest. Can you imagine if they tried this with Batman?? I seriously hope he didn't make Aunt May sew up that ridiculous spandex swimsuit. And I think we can all agree that Beach Spider-Man needs to lay off the juice.
Snoopafly
Blunt and munchies not included.
The Meat From 'Rocky'
Someone, somewhere thought this would be a great idea. Yikes. Probably not a good idea to make something look like delicious meat if you're concerned about choking hazards.
Skidmark, G.I. Joe
I guess they came up against trademark infringement with their original nickname, Hershey Squirt. But don't worry, Skidmark, at least you didn't get saddled with this guy's moniker.
Meet Masters of the Universe character, Fisto, everyone:
So named because he um...has a giant fist? I'm hoping.
The Albino Bowler
I really have nothing to say except...WHAT. THE. FIRETRUCK. And... I TOTALLY WANT!
George Lucas In Stormtrooper Disguise
This action proves that yes, George Lucas, does ruin everything. You gotta love his 1970's Playgirl makeover. Here's hoping that Leia slayed his ass when he tried to make a move on her.
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