Arkham city is mostly a nightmare hellscape. But as dark, sinister, steel, cold, and deadly as much of Arkham City is, and as important as it is for Batman to stop those in charge of Arkham City from committing their evil deeds, it would be nice for him to stop and smell the flowers every once in a while at some of Arkham City's nicer locations. Locations like:
The Arkham City Fuddruckers
The best place in Arkham city to get a serious burger for a serious hunger. Plus, you get free crayons to color their fun placemat mazes with. Come on Batman, you know you like to color.
The Arkham City Rite-Aid
Right now they've got a buy one get one free special on Chex Party Mix! I don't care whether your parents were killed in front of you in a freak accident or not, nobody doesn't like pretzels and Chex together in one handy package!
The Arkham City Giant Rabbit Petting Park
Now That's what I call livin'! Plus, if you solve three riddler challenges you get a free dollop of ice cream to put on a rabbit's nose.
One Of The Many Public Restrooms
Batman, you never went once the entire time you were in Arkham Asylum, and you haven't gone the whole time you've been struggling through Arkham city, your stomach must be one giant block of crap right now. Take a load off.
The Arkham City Build-A-Bear
Come on Batman, I know you and Catwoman have an anniversary coming up...
The Arkham City Farmer's Market
Honestly, this isn't the best Farmer's Market in the world. The Riddler has made it so that the guava melons are all rigged to explode if you don't eat them in the right order, I wouldn't go near Joker's "fresh fish," and if you're smart you won't eat whatever that pile of strange dark chunky stuff Croc is selling. The guy who's selling fresh baked bread is great though, his stuff's been on Oprah.
Equestria
Equestria is a magical place where unicorn ponies are sent to learn the true nature of friendship. Unfortunately for them it is located in the dead center of Arkham City. It's a good thing for Batman that it's there too. With the way he's been ignoring Robin lately he could definitely use a trip through Ponyville to teach him a thing or two about being friends.
What other places in Arkham City should Batman go? Let us know in the comments!
Comments
Post a Comment