The reason everyone hates things like pop quizzes and jump scares in horror movies is because we like to be prepared. With that in mind, do you have any idea what you'd choose if an all-powerful genie or something offered you the chance to transform into any one animal at will? Weren't prepared for that, were you? Here are some animals you should strongly consider transforming into.
Stag
Nothing is more graceful and powerful than the stag, an animal with the grace of a dancer and the, uh, antlers of a stag. Another thing to think about is that, as the only human to be able to transform into a stag, you can combine your stag antlers with your human knowledge of pole-vaulting to start setting world record leaps. Something to think about.
Kraken
The Kraken is a powerful beast capable of consuming an entire ship if it so desires. The only downside to being a Kraken is that they can only come out into the world when they're summoned by Liam Neeson.
Socially Awkward Penguin
Are you marble-mouthed, self-concious, and unable to go an entire party without talking about Skyrim? These traits aren't going to go away, even if you transform into a magnificent beast of an animal. If you turn into Socially Awkward Penguin, at least the discomfort you create will be adorable.
Tiger
Tigers eat people. If you transform into a tiger, you can eat people. That's a pretty good reason to turn into a tiger!
Snuffleupagus
Transforming into a Snuffleupagus is what the sage Miley Cyrus would call "the best of both worlds". You'll have all the strength you would have gotten from choosing a wooly mammoth and all the likability of a golden retriever in a Sherlock Holmes costume.
Jake The Snake Roberts
Jake The Snake Roberts is a great choice to animorph into, as he didn't take any crap from anyone and came to the ring with a SNAKE. It's like double the animal.
Koala
Transforming into a koala is the equivalent of going to community college. Animorph into a koala if a life of sitting and chewing slowly and playing Skyrim for days at a time isn't immediately depressing. Also, studies indicate that people who choose to animorph into a koala are more likely to graduate from community college. So there's that.
Your Mom
Aw snap.
Which animal would you choose? Tell us in the comments!
Comments
Post a Comment