Fast food drive-thru cashiers are the unsung heroes of our time. They feed the world’s needy, late-night crazies, and documentarians, offering up round-the-clock nourishment for just a few bucks. In exchange, they’re forced to deal with the worst in people: angry orderers yelling through a sub-par intercom system because they’ve waited in their cars too long and there was some misunderstanding about the word “double.” Perhaps these people just need a guide… here’s how NOT to be an a-hole at a drive-thru.
Don’t Say: “Psych!”
The addition of “psych” to any order is bound to throw your server for a loop. Did you mean it? Did you not? Did the “psych” extend to both burgers AND fries, or did you lie about not wanting one of those items? By the time your server is finished with the emotional turmoil you’ve inflicted, your meal’s going to suck, anyway.
Don’t Autotune Yourself
As tempting as it is, try to restrain yourself from pre-recording your order into the autotune app on your iPhone and then playing it for the speaker system. Your server might think we’re under attack from alien/T-Pain invasion and run for her end-of-the-world bunker (every In-N-Out has one).
Don’t Say: “Joe Sent Me”
I know speakeasies are making a comeback, but trust me, there isn’t one in the back of your local McDonald’s. Any rumors of a “secret menu” are just, like, getting an extra layer of mayo on your chicken sandwich. If you’re trying to get into the back room at a fast food joint, you’re missing the point.
Don’t Mention Yelp
Everyone’s a restaurant critic nowadays. Do your local Wendy’s worker a favor and don’t lord it over him as a means of getting you your shake faster. Elite on Yelp usually just translates to Annoying in Life.
Don’t Walk Up Through the Car Lane
You’re not the first one to try it, and jumping really hard on the motion sensors usually doesn’t work…you at least need a tandem bike for that (proven fact). Just walk inside; I’ll bet you find you DO have to use the bathroom.
Don’t Give A Fake Name
Telling the server that your name is Shaniqua or Bartholomew is so annoying for the person who drives up after you who’s actually named Shaniqua or Bartholomew.
Don’t Do the Dude Where’s My Car Thing
No “and then”! But seriously, I am so mad at Ashton right now. Don’t try and emulate him or you’re the biggest a-hole. He was like a father to those kids.
Have you guys seen other people do annoying things at a drive-thru? Call them out in the comments section!
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