Super Powers I'm Glad I Don't Have

Daniel Dominguez

Not all Super Powers are a blessing. Don't get me wrong. Some powers are great. Spider sense is great because you can sense when enemies are coming. Flight is awesome because you can fly. Heat vision is awesome because you don't need to buy a microwave to make Hot Pockets. But some powers are less than ideal to have, such as:

 

Heat Sneezing

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Way harder to control than heat vision, and even more difficult to aim.

 

Dogs For Hands

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Cool for about three minutes, then it's just plum inconvenient.

 

Ultra-Racism

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Very hard to make friends with this power.

 

Emotional Invulnerability

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Being physically invulnerable keeps bullets and swords from piercing you, emotional invulnerability makes it impossible for you to truly know the joy of watching the sun rise.

 

Ice Breath

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Sure, you'll stop some flame-based bad guys, but try kissing a girl without immediately freezing her head.

 

The Ability To Speak To Bees

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F***ing useless. Bee language only consists of the same sentence over and over again.

 

Deer Sense

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Getting bit by a radioactive deer is not nearly as useful as getting bitten by a radioactive spider.

 

What other super powers are you glad you don't have? Let us know in the comments!

 

Check Out The Worst Superheroes Ever!

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