Ghost Rider is the undead spirit of all that is vengeance. He stalks the Earth with the ability to stare into the very soul of any man and show that man the horror of his own sins. But he is still a creature of this Earth, as are we all, and therefore he, like us, has his own difficulties to face. These are them:
He Can't Sit Under An Awning
There goes sipping Chamomile tea at outdoor coffee shops on a nice summer day, which is too bad cuz that's one of Ghost Rider's favorite things.
He Can't Brush His Teeth
You try to find a reasonably priced fireproof toothbrush. It ain't easy.
He Can't Pick Up Cute Cats And Rub Them On His Nose
He learned that lesson the hard way once with his pet cat "Silly Friend", and once, believe me, was enough.
He Comes Off As Shy On First Dates
Girls on first dates with Ghost Rider always write him off as shy because he won't look them in the eyes, when really he's just trying to penance stare them and destroy their minds.
He Can Only Be Ghost Rider For Halloween
He can't change clothes, he's trapped in his sweet biker gear and his head is on fire. So everyone year he's the same damn thing at Halloween parties: himself. When more than anyone he has always wanted with all his heart to be Puck, from "A Midsummer Night's Dream." Mischevious Puck, who with apple cheeks sneaks into milk maid's parlor in the dusky eve and sours all their milk! What a troublemaker, he!
He Must Live Forever, Stalked By The Forces Of Evil, Exacting Vengeance Under The Cover Of Night, Alone On His Quest, With No One To Love, And No Place To Call Home
That's even worse than finding out your World Of Warcraft account got hacked!
He'll Never Be Able To Savor The Sweet Flavor Of An IHOP Rooty Tooty Fresh And Fruity
Just because he has no taste buds doesn't mean he has no dreams. Fresh dreams. Fruity dreams. Rooty dreams. Tooty dreams.
What other troubles does Ghost Rider have to deal with in his daily life? Let us know in the comments!
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