Japan, like any half-way decent country, has many festivals celebrating the two most common kinds of human genitals.
These festivals are rooted in ancient Japanese agricultural history, and the old belief that Earth gets impregnated by Heaven. Earth is a naughty girl.
The most popular of these festivals takes place at Komaki City's Tomaka Shrine, where more than 100,000 people gather to celebrate, buy penis shaped nick nacks, eat chocolate covered bananas, and think about how hot it would be to watch the entire sky inseminate the entire Earth.
This giant pink penis is the actual preserved penis of the first Japanese Emperor, who is the only recorded human being to have been gifted with a penis several times larger than himself.
In the interest of equality, a neighboring village also holds the Hime-no-miya Grand Vagina Festival, which is similar to the penis festival, except for a giant sentient vagina about the size of a helicopter that descends every fifteen minutes to consume and digest another onlooker.
While there is no actual giant floating human flesh hungry vagina at either festival, both festivals are a lot of fun, and an interesting ancient way to celebrate fertility.
How do you celebrate fertility? Let us know in the comments!
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