Very Best Of FMyLife: Star Wars Edition

FMyLife

Star Wars is great because it made it so George Lucas could afford to hire immigrant women to wipe himself when he goes to the bathroom, But sometimes Star Wars be a real bummer too, like when someone breaks a DVD copy and comes at you with the sharp part in a bar fight. That's where FMylife comes in, collecting the worst moments of our lives, all in one place. Here are some of the best Star Wars moments this week!

 

The Dark Side Works Better

Today, I walked in on my sister sitting on the toilet, trying to use "The Force" to pull over the toilet paper roll sitting on the sink. FML

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You Are Not An Alpha Male

Today, my mother sold my extensive Star Wars collection, and I cried when I found out. I'm 46. FML

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You're Wrong That's Awesome

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

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You Murdered R2-D2

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

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The Force Is Not So Selfish

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

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As Long As He Made You Wear A Leia Bikini

Today, my boyfriend of two years said he would finally take me somewhere romantic. I spent my day at a Star Wars convention. FML

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This Is Funny Now, But It Will Be Painful Later

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

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I Don't Think He'll Mind

Today, I was on a date with a guy having a great time. I went up to go to the ladies' room, but as I walked back to the table, I heard some giggles. I looked and found out why. My skirt was tucked into my underwear. I was wearing my lucky Star Wars-themed panties. FML

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She's Got A Good Head On Her Shoulders

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

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