Lindsay Lohan has made dozens of arrests in position as super double secret FBI agent. From the nefarous Osama Bin Laden, to the treacharous Decepticons, Lindsay Lohan has arrested some of history's greatest criminals. But now Lindsay Lohan has made her ultimate arrest: her own bad self.
Lindsay is "putting herself under house arrest" for two weeks so that she does not do any more damage to herself or others.
Above is a picture of Lindsay in Heaven, where she will allegedly go when she dies.
Lindsay will of course be able to leave the house for things she is required to do. The main thing being, and yes this is true, her court ordered community service at the morgue.
"I'm just happy to be able to give something back."
Lindsay claims she made the choice to do this of her own volition and simply because it was the right thing to do, although suspicion is shed on that claim by the assertion of a club goer in Hollywood that Lindsay allegedly hit him with her car early last Thursday morning.
So if any of you were still thinking about wanting to be Disney stars let this be a warning. Being an actress for Disney will break your brain. Miley Cyrus, anyone? What percentage of adult Disney stars have been to rehab? The House of Mouse, as they call it, if you've actually ever seen it, looks more like this:
Hey, come work for Disney. We promise not to eat your soul.
With all the hell she's been put through by us, the voyeuristic public, and her own obvious emotional problems, I'm honestly just proud of the girl that she hasn't become a scientologist yet. So, hey, chalk that up as a success.
What would you do with a night on the town if you were Lindsay Lohan? Let us know in the comments!
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