Whatever wakes you up in the morning, be it a quick jog, a hot cup of coffee, or two Five Hour Energies mixed with a half-gallon of Welch's Strawberry Breeze and Excedrin (I have a sleeping sickness, all right?), make sure you've had your fill before you watch the new Rebecca Black video, "Sing It" — it's pretty boring.
Maybe it's unfair to judge Sing It against Friday, but man is this video no Friday. Friday was pure insanity. Every time I watched that video I felt like I was having a fever dream. There was mad rhythmic chanting, girls dancing like reanimated corpses, and a rapper who doesn't rhyme. Friday wasn't a music video. Friday was a prophecy of the end times.
The question that will determine your eternal fate: Which seat shall you take?
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But at the very least Friday was weird and fascinating. How many times have we heard someone sing "turn it up, turn it up, I feel ya now"? They're the most tired pop lyrics of all time! It's like they wrote this song with a pop music version of those magnet words you can rearrange to form sentences on your refrigerator. Except they wrote the song after a party where someone stole most of the words to take home and put on their refrigerator.
"I told you not to invite Dave!"
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It isn't Rebecca Black's fault. She's doing what she can with what she's given. But I would love for someone to take up the mantle of songs that are just surprising nonsense. Like maybe Demi Lovato could come out with a song about the menu at Jack in the Box and the bridge could be sung by a minotaur.
"♫Bacon cheese biscuit looks kinda good/ sausage croissant kinda looks good too♫"
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What'd you think of the new Rebecca Black video? Let me know on Twitter or leave a comment below!
Check out 9 reasons Rebecca Black might be awesome!
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