Heterosexual celebrity young couple Miley Cyrus and not Thor are getting married you guys! You’re not invited to the wedding. Sorryz! But...that doesn’t mean you can’t give the soon-to-weds something. No, not the gift of foresight into their probable divorce. These are celebrity odds people, not just because they’re too young and that technically Miley can’t drink at her own wedding. But hey, let’s hope for the best by bestowing on them in this time of great joy,gifts to celebrate their eternalish love.
Bridal Bong
Truly this is the gift for this couple that will keep on giving. What do you think the odds are she walks down the aisle to Bob Marley’s “One Love”? Even money?
Father-In-Law Diversion
Some could call it a diversion, others may call it something shiny. Either way, best not to have too much Billy Ray in the mix. It has been my family motto for generations.
Extra Hunger Games Security
In the upcoming Catching Fire film, Liam’s Gale will have a lot more screen time and girls will just be lying in wait for the young hunk. I’m not saying you should get Miley a taser but I AM saying, you should get Miley a taser. After using it she could blow on the end and say, “Odds weren’t in your favor today, tutz” and then glasses go down, The Who pumps up, YEAAAAAH!
Actually Watch The Last Song
What would really put this gift over the edge is if you tell them to their faces that the film was better than the Notebook.
Creepy Crawlers
What couple wouldn’t want Creepy Crawlers? Best gift ever! And if they don’t want it, I call dibs. My parents never wanted to give me one because they were afraid I’d burn myself on the light bulb in the oven. But I’ll show them! I’ll freak them out by creating neon jiggling bugs that are missing limbs because the goo wouldn’t spread evenly and are obviously not real in their food. Ha! I’m awesome!
What would you get Miley and Liam to honor their nuptials? Let us know in the comments.
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