7 Fake Dark Knight Rises Spoilers!

Zach Ames

If anything has a chance of toppling the success of The Avengers, it's The Dark Knight Rises. This is one of the most anticipated movies to come out in the last few years. One of the reasons that it's so anticipated is that very few spoilers have been leaked to the public. Smosh had a spy on set who found out all of the secret plot twists. Here are Fake The Dark Knight Rises Spoilers:

 

Batman Was Bruce Wayne The Whole Time

batman and bruce wayne

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What? No way. You mean to tell me this whole time that one rich dude was also that one bat dude. THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING! Now I know why Batman wanted to save Bruce Wayne's girlfriend so bad.

 

The Final Scene Is Bob Newhart Waking Up From A Crazy Batman Dream

Honey, wake up. You won't believe the dream I just had. I was the Batman in this crazy city called Gotham. Nothing made sense in this place. There was a guy with half a face. And another guy dressed like a clown. And this third guy that you couldn't understand because he was wearing a stupid mask.

 

Catwoman Becomes Pregnant And Gives Birth To Lion-O From Thundercats

liono cosplay

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Yeah. It's pretty gross. But it happened, and you just have to deal with that knowledge. The best thing about this spoiler is that you get to keep watching it over and over in your brain because IT WILL HAUNT YOUR NIGHTMARES!

 

Bane Kills Batman And Pikachu Becomes The New Batman

pikachu batman

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Pikachu is the perfect replacement for Batman. He doesn't need a utility belt because his lightning attack is already built in to his body. What I really want to see is Ash Ketchum as Robin. He'd look so adorable in his little costume.

 

Batman And Bane Forgive Each Other And Go On A Camping Trip

batman campground sign

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Batman and Bane realize that the reason they keep fighting each other is because they just like spending time together. The go on a long weekend camping trip to really get to know each other. Not as superhero and supervillain, but just as two bros doing bro stuff. Nothing heals old wounds like cracking a beer down at the fishing hole.

 

A Hole Rips In The Space-Time Continuum And All Of The Old Batmen Form A Team

all of the batmen

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Bane is supposed to be the greatest supervillain of all time. There's no way just one Batman could stop him. That's why Lucious Fox builds a machine to create a dimensional portal and all of the Batmen from every movie form a team to beat Bane.

 

Bane Is Snooki's Baby Daddy

snooki from south park

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Snooki has said it over and over. She loves big raging gorilla juiceheads. No one juices harder than Bane. It's a match made in a Heaven. Actually, it's a match made in Hell and their baby will be the bringer of doom and destruction to the world. Like father, like son.

 

Bane Sounds Like Fred Figglehorn When He Takes His Mask Off

bane figglehorn

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Everyone keeps complaining that you can't understand what Bane says with his mask on. The reason he keeps it on is so he doesn't sound like an 8-year-old fairy. It's pretty hard to sound menacing when you haven't hit puberty yet.

 

What do you think will happen in the next Batman movie? Let me know @zachlunch or tell us in the comments!

 

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