Borderlands 2 goes gold, ESRB description is rather hilarious

By Stephany Nunneley

Borderlands 2 went gold yesterday, and the best way to celebrate the occasion, is by posting the ESRB description.

We’ll just let you read it for yourself:

“This is a first-person shooter in which players join rebel forces to take down an oppressive corporation on the fictional planet of Pandora. As players explore open-world environments, they complete missions to gain experience and increase their characters’ skills/abilities. Players use machine guns, sniper rifles, flamethrowers, explosives, and weaponized vehicles to kill human-like characters and hostile aliens in frequent combat. Firefights contain realistic gunfire/explosions; injured enemies scream and emit exaggerated splashes of blood.

“Various weapons result in dismembered limbs or bloody gibs. Some missions depict intense acts of violence: viewing characters getting electrocuted; shooting a man in the face; killing players’ incinerating a cult member as part of a ritual sacrifice.

“The dialogue contains jokes/one-liners that reference sexual material (e.g., “I will hang myself from my own tombstone if in you I can’t put my bone,” “If there’s anything they love more than getting to second base with their sisters, it’s cars,” “Bacon is for sycophants and products of incest.”); during some sequences, players can find and collect adult-themed magazines—though no actual nudity is depicted.

“One mission requires players to consume three alcoholic beverages from a bar before they can progress. The words “shit,” “pussies,” and “asshole” can be heard in the dialogue, in addition to language censored by audible bleeps (e.g., “God-[bleep]-ing-dammit”).”

Sounds awesome. I’ve been re-playing the first on PS3 this past week to get prepped for it. Needless to say, I’ve died a lot, but I’m damned rich.

Borderlands 2 releases on September 18 in the US and September 21 in Europe for PC, PS3, and Xbox 360.

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