I'm tired of going to regular old boring schools. I want to go to an awesome school like I see on the TV. Maybe if I went to a school that was fun, I wouldn 't have failed every semester. Of course, if I didn't fail out of school then I probably wouldn't be working for Smosh! What a terrible life that would be! Here are fictional schools that I want to attend.
Greendale Community College (Community)
This school is always doing crazy stuff. They've had giant pillow and blanket forts and a school wide paintball gun fight. If that isn't cool enough, there's a monkey that roams the air ducts. When I tried to bring a monkey to school everyone just got mad at me and called animal control.
Battle School (Ender's Game)
This is a school in outer space that is designed to train the best and brightest on planet earth to become military generals. The coolest thing at this school is that they play an awesome zero gravity space fighting game as well as a ton of other fun battle video games. I wish I went to a school where I got to play lazer tag and Call Of Duty all day. If that became the new educational standards, we'd have the best schools in the world.
Jedi Temple (Star Wars)
Who wouldn't want to be a Jedi? You get fancy powers and a light saber. Unfortunately, Darth Vader wiped out everyone in the temple. Death by force choke is not the kind of graduation present that I want. I was hoping for a swoop bike. I NEVER GET WHAT I WANT!
Pokemon Trainers School (Pokemon)
I want to feel the smoothness of the Pokeball in my hand as I throw it and smell the burnt air after Pikachu blasts an electric charge. I try to do what I can, but there are no really good substitutes. Sure, having all of my stuffed Pokemon toys fight each other every day is fun, but it's just not enough.
Forks High School (Twilight)
The fun of going to this school is that you would get to be a modern Van Helsing. It would be so satisfying to finally take down those sparkly vampires. I'm pretty sure the President would give you a medal.
Mars University (Futurama)
Remember earlier when I said how awesome it would be to have a monkey running around the air vents? It would be even more awesome to have a talking roommate monkey. Sure, he's a little uppity, but you could win every fight over dishes by throwing bananas at him. Just don't knock off his little hat that makes him smart or you're going to get some poo flung in your face.
Walkerville Elementary School (The Magic School Bus)
My school bus was driven by a drunk old hillbilly. The only fun place he ever took us was when we would stop at convenience stores so he could buy more beer. Have you ever wanted to swim to the bottom of the ocean and hang out with fish or see a brain from the inside? I know I have. I'm definitely a hands on learner, and there is no better way to learn than putting yourself inside whatever it is that you're trying to learn about. Just make sure you call in sick the day that you learn about butts.
What fictional school do you want to attend? Let me know on twitter @zachlunch or in the comments below!
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