These kids show characters really need your help and all you do is laugh at them. Shame on you. How would you feel if someone just laughed at you every time you needed some help. I hope you feel as terrible as you are. Here are kids show characters that desperately need your help.
Oscar The Grouch (Sesame Street)
The people of Sesame Street seem to really care about each other's well being with one exception. Oscar The Grouch is so destitute that he lives in a trashcan and no one seems to care or want to help him. He once had a promising career on Wall Street, but then it all fell apart and now he lives on the streets. They better be careful cause every hobo carries a knife, and one of these days Oscar The Grouch is going cut someone up.
Zoboomafoo (Zoboomafoo)
Zoboomafoo comes from the land of Zobooland. You may not know this, but the rain forest in Zobooland is being destroyed by like a million acres a minute or something. What are Zoboomafoo and all of his friends going to do if their homes get destroyed and replaced with office buildings? I guess they'll just have to get a telemarketing job selling fake car warranties to old people.
Gargoyles (Disney's Gargoyles)
There are only like six or so gargoyles left on the whole planet. That makes them one of the most endangered species to be alive today. We need to get them to start mating now! What puts gargoyles in the mood? Maybe I should Google that... OH GOD NO! MY EYES! I'LL NEVER SEE AGAIN!!!
Pig Pen (Peanuts)
This kid is filthy. How can the Peanuts gang worry about a great pumpkin or some dumb tree when their friend is so filthy that a cloud of gross follows him everywhere he goes. He's got so many infections that I'm pretty sure that Pig Pen will be ground zero for the Pandemic Apocalypse.
Stephanie (LazyTown)
Watching LazyTown is pretty much like watching a drug induced nightmare. The only thing worse than having to watch LazyTown is having to live in it. Since she's the only one who looks normal in the series, we must assume that the entire series takes place in Stephanie's horrible hallucination. Someone please take this girl to rehab!
Rita And Runt (Animaniacs)
Rita and Runt might be one of the saddest cartoons to ever air. It's about two homeless animals that are trying to find someone to adopt them. Of course, it never quite turns out right and they are always once again left on the mean streets to fend for themselves. The only thing that could make this show sadder is if the theme song was composed by Sarah McLachlan.
Pokemon
Pokemon exist in a world where it is totally cool for people to fight their pets against each other for sport which is pretty barbaric by anyone's standards especially since some of them seem to be sentient beings. Unfortunately, no one wants to play a Pokemon game where all of the animals are just friends with each other. That's why Pokemon Snap never got a sequel.
Donnie (The Wild Thornberrys)
Donnie is the adopted child of the Thornberrys. Because he was raised by an orangutan, Donnie is feral and can't talk. Rather than put Donnie in a special school where he can be taught to talk and read and write and act like a person, the Thornberrys take him on dangerous adventures. I think he might have been better off with the orangutan.
Would you be willing to give just one dollar a day to help these kids show characters have a better life? Let me know on twitter @zachlunch or in the comments below!
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