I’m a pretty grim guy, and I can find a good reason to dislike just about anything. Lately, I’ve decided to step up my game, and not just go after life’s petty annoyances. No no, I’ve decided to bring out the big guns, and go after bigger targets, like time, or the number zero (how can something be a number if it isn’t actually anything?) As a part of my ongoing quest to dislike everything, I would now like to share with you my Compelling Reasons To Hate Every Day Of The Week:
Monday
Guys, is lasagna delicious? Yes. Then who are we to not listen to the other pieces of wisdom that came from the cartoon cat Garfield, such as “I hate Mondays”. That’s right, with that nugget on everything from posters, to t-shirts, to tattoos (I imagine), everyone hates Mondays. It almost feels cruel to keep beating up on it, but maybe if it wasn’t so damn hateable it wouldn’t be in this position.
Tuesday
Tuesday? I just don’t like Tuesday’s face.
Wednesday
Commonly known as “hump day”, Wednesday falls right in the middle of the common work week, and is a reminder of just how little you’ve gotten done by the time the week is half over. That’s depressing, and Wednesday is a total jerk for putting you through that.
Thursday
Another day whose name starts with a “T”? Come on, there are twenty six letters in the alphabet, you can’t share the wealth a little bit?
Friday
Sure, Friday is the start of the weekend, so it probably seems pretty bullet proof to hatred. Not so fast, Friday apologist! Friday sucks BECAUSE it’s the start of the weekend. Anyone who has lived even moderately close to a bar knows that Friday’s are horrible because people like to go out and get WAY too drunk, and then way back to their cars and talk WAY too loudly. Saturday at least has some people so hung over they need to take the night off, but Friday is such a tension reliever for so many, you really get the most amount of obnoxious people walking the streets at once.
Saturday
The only day that you probably don’t have to work, and also don’t have to work the day after. This leads to an insane amount of pressure to have an EPIC SATURDAY, BRO! Pressure causes anxiety, and anxiety is not something that leads to a particularly fun day, so “boo” to you, Saturday!
Sunday
Ugh, Sunday is the worst. An ideal Sunday would be spent just doing something relaxing, and taking it easy. But no, it’s your last day off, so you feel the need to make it count! Also, there’s a good chance someone in your life is putting pressure on you to waste some of your day at church, or a flea market. Sunday is never not a disappointment.
So, what else guys? Let us know in the comments!
Comments
Post a Comment