Musicians love putting stars in their videos, mostly because it makes them look cool by association. But the celeb cameos in these clips are just bizarre.
Zach Galifianakis in Kanye West’s “Can’t Tell Me Nothin’”
Zach Galifianakis, pre-The Hangover franchise, drives tractors and competently lip syncs alongside pal Will Oldham (a.k.a. Bonnie Prince Billy) in this truly odd video, which was shot on location at Galifianakis' farm in North Carolina. Kanye gave Galifianakis complete creative control – creative control that resulted in scenes like him menacingly revving a chainsaw with the sentence "I Heart Turd!" written on his face.
Shia LaBeouf in Sigur Rós’s “Fjögur Píanó”
LaBeouf strips down to LaBUFF (see what I did there?) in this tedious, “artsy” video from the tedious, “artsy” Icelandic band Sigur Rós. The outrageously self-indulgent eight and a half minute epic features LaBeouf "emoting" (by which I mean to say getting teary eyed), showing his ding-dong off whilst wearing a furry vest, performing a synchronized dance with a topless chick, and sensually licking one of those lollipops with bugs inside of it. The YouTube clip attached is also entitled “Fjögur Píanó” – it, however, is just 11 seconds of footage from Team Fortress 2. The clip in question is way cooler than the Sigur Rós video, though, because it features 100% less ding-dong. (Looking at ding-dongs makes Baby Jesus cry, after all. And when Baby Jesus cries, I cry...OK?!)
Kim Basinger in Tom Petty's "Mary Jane's Last Dance"
In 1994’s MTV Video Music Award (!!!) winning clip, Basinger plays a corpse Petty (a morgue assistant) wants to, uh, get freaky with. Watching his gloved hand caress her lips as she lays on the slab is genuinely disturbing, especially given the fact that Petty naturally looks like a serial killer. After manhandling her mouth, he takes her home, gussies her up and dances with her. Wait – you didn't think "last dance with Mary Jane" was a pot reference, did you? It's about something way less disturbing...making it with a dead chick!
Tons o’ Folks in Vampire Weekend's "Giving Up the Gun"
Remember when Vampire Weekend released a second album? Me neither. Anyway, their video for "Giving Up the Gun", one of the singles from that album, is a star-studded, noggin-scratching affair. In it, RZA (weird) officiates a tennis competition. Lil Jon (way weird) is the main competitor’s coach; he helps her battle a wacky cast of characters that include Jake Gyllenhaal, Joe Jonas and a samurai (like, super friggin’ weird). Jonas looks all Richie Tenenbaumed out, Lil Jon wears a W.C. Fields-esque straw hat, and the whole kooky thing is intercut with footage of the band performing the song (which, to the surprise of no one, sounds like all their other songs).
Robert Downey Jr. in Elton John's "I Want Love"
The whole video is just RobDown (I call him RobDown) wandering the halls of a huge, empty, ornate house, smolderingly peering into the camera and lip synchin' his lil’ heart out. It’s one long, continuous shot, and it took 16 takes to get it right. (RobDown’s such a hard little worker!) RobDown looks totes hot, though, on account of the fact that the video was shot before he grew that dumbass goatee of his.
Chevy Chase in Paul Simon's "You Can Call Me Al"
I don’t think I’m being out of line when I say that Chevy Chase’s appearance in this video is the original super weird celebrity music video cameo. The video generates major LOLs for two reasons: because the Chevster is over a foot taller than Simon, and because he poorly pretends to play the trumpet. Ironically, Chevy Chase actually is a musician – he was the drummer for a band that eventually became Steely Dan. Did I just totally blow your mind? Or do you even care? Probably the latter, right? You’re making the right choice.
A Buttload of People in Jaime Foxx's "Blame It"
Multiple famous folks came out of the woodwork to appear in this movie-like video for Foxx’s disgustingly catchy tribute to the joys of autotune and alcoholism. A ridiculous mixture of A-listers (Ron Howard, Forest Whitaker, Jake Gyllenhaal, Samuel L. Jackson), B-listers (Cedric the Entertainer, Mos Def) and unranked-listers (Tatyana Ali, Bill Bellamy, that chick named LeToya who got kicked out of Destiny's Child) party in a red room filled with babes. It looks as awkward as it sounds.
Pamela Anderson in Lit’s “Miserable”
Wanna know what happens in this video? The members of Lit (‘member them?) play their mid-tempo rock on Pamela Anderson's ass, then get eaten by her. She's wearing super dated platform shoes, has a "The Rachel"-esque hairstyle and is sporting WAY too much eyeshadow. Ah, 1999...it was a simpler time, folks.
Remember when Ben Affleck rubbed Jennifer Lopez’s butt in her “Jenny From the Block” video? That was pretty funny, right? Agree with me in the comments!
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