A recent report from Aint It Cool suggested Disney may be working on not only a new Star Wars trilogy, but also a stand-alone movie focusing on Yoda. (EDIT: Aint It Cool has also just reported on the rumor of Han Solo and Boba Fett one-off films.) A new Yoda movie, potentially in production, is great news, as it implies Disney isn't as beholden to the one note that's kept a Yoda movie from even being considered before:
"Audiences can't relate to characters shorter than they are." - extremely tall studio exec
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And that rumor picked up steam when Disney CEO Bob Iger spoke with CNBC and confirmed that the writer of Empire Strikes Back, Lawrence Kasdan and fellow writer Simon Kinsberg were working on Star Wars films separate from the new trilogy. "We are in fact working on a few stand-alone films. Kasdan and Simon Kinberg are both working on films derived from great Star Wars characters that are not part of the overall saga. So we plan to make Star Wars VII, VIII and IX over roughly a six-year period of time starting in 2015. But there are going to be a few other films released in that period of time too."
So basically Disney is going to be perpetually making Star Wars movies. Don't be surprised if in ten years all movies are Star Wars movies. And don't think you're exempt — that movie you're writing about off-beat but relatable characters who bond over their shared love of The Smiths?
It will be bought by Disney and it will be turned into a Grand Moff Tarkin vehicle.
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You had to know extra Star Wars movies were coming though, right? Disney paid SO MUCH MONEY for Star Wars, and they're going to do absolutely everything in their power to get as much out of it as they can. It's like if you're a dairy farmer, and you buy the world's most expensive cow, you're going to milk that cow every damn day until it's completely dried out. And then, when that cow dies from exhaustion, you wring all the milk out of its udders, boil its bones to make milk soup, and grind its brain and eyeballs until they become milk.
Dairy farmers are real messed up.
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But is a Yoda movie really a good idea? To me, Yoda is an example of a side character who everyone loves but can in no way carry his own story. There's a reason we have main characters, even though they're almost inherently less cool than the side characters for the same reason we don't eat cakes made entirely out of frosting — you've got to layer that sugary fun on top of a solid foundation, not make it the main course. A stand-alone Yoda movie would be like Seinfeld without Jerry. The Great Gatsby without Nick Carraway. Resident Evil without human beings.
Although Resident Evil without humans could work if they focus on Tyrant's high school football career,
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What Star Wars character would you want to see in a stand-alone Star Wars movie? Besides Boba Fett. Obviously. Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!
Check out Ten Reasons Disney's Purchase of Star Wars is the BEST News!
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