They ruined lives. They destroyed civilizations. One of them just flat out ate people. But sometimes when you remove a villain from their natural element you might just find they have what it takes to be the hero another story needed all along…
Darth Vader
New Story: “Mary Poppins”
Heroic Action: Darth Vader’s first order of business was to always serve his master. Unfortunately, his last employer wasn’t exactly the head of Habitat for Humanity. But if he were to serve as a nanny to the two Banks children in “Mary Poppins”—who want nothing more than their dad’s love and attention—Darth would do everything in his power from reading minds to lightsaber duels to just chocking anyone without lifting a finger to make sure the entire family lived happily ever after.
Lord Voldemort
New Story: “Peanuts”
Heroic Action: As Tom Riddle, Lord Voldemort was always rather friendless and the odd kid out. But as the equally outcast (and now equally bald) Charlie Brown, he could use his immense powers to make sure that not only did Charlie win every baseball game and finally get his own dog to respect him, but also that all the kids in the neighborhood would let him do as he pleases, especially since apparently there are no adults in the “Peanuts” neighborhood to stop him.
Loki
New Story: “Transformers: Dark of the Moon”
Heroic Action: What if when Loki attacks with wave after wave of Chitauri he arrives not in New York City but rather Chicago just as it is under siege by Decepticons? With his massive alien army, Loki could easily prevent the giant robots from taking over Earth without ever having to call in the Avengers (who couldn’t come anyway because of copyright infringement and the fact most of them stay in New York because they just bought that pricier MetroCard). Of course, who would then stop Loki from taking over the planet would have to be addressed in the sequel that hopefully would involve no Transformers.
The Joker
New Story: “Oz the Great and Powerful”
Heroic Action: Much like he seemed to come out of nowhere, overthrew a city’s evil element (only so he could run his own crime syndicate) and wound up ostensibly controlling Gotham in “The Dark Knight,” The Joker could achieve the very same effect in “Oz.” He could just as easily “magically” land in Oz, defeat the Wicked Witch, and assume leadership of the Emerald City. This would then serve as the prequel to “The Wizard of Oz,” in which Dorothy arrives to find Munchkinland run by clown-faced assassins and that the Scarecrow was set on fire with a huge pile of cash long ago.
Gollum
New Story: “King Arthur and His Knights of the Round Table”
Heroic Action: A tragic figure consumed with forever searching for a lost possession, Gollum’s crippling obsessive-compulsive nature would come in handy in finding the coveted Holy Grail for King Arthur long before any of his knights could. However, whether Gollum would just gladly hand over the grail or rename it “Precious II” and make a run for it is anyone’s guess.
Jaws
New Story: “Shark Week”
Heroic Action: Okay, maybe he won’t come off looking like the hero. But every time the Great White of “Jaws” would remove a limb it would be in the educational context of “This is what sharks are supposed to do,” especially if you keep pointing a camera at them while taunting them from inside an underwater cage.
Can you think of any other villains who could be hereos? Let us know in the comments!
Comments
Post a Comment