For a cartoon to be successful, it needs not only a main character but also supporting characters so they can have adventures and prevent viewers from wondering why they spent 30 minutes watching Batman wander aimlessly through an empty Gotham. But sometimes those secondary characters—or sidekicks—are so interesting they deserve their own spin-off series, if for no other reason than those shows would have to be better than almost anything on NBC right now…
Patrick Star
Patrick’s new series begins when he’s caught in a net, hauled up to a boat, left to dry out under the hot sun, and placed on a shelf as a tacky souvenir in a beach tourist shop in Florida. Each episode then shows the now very still Patrick spending his days alongside a whole new cast of secondary characters, including a painted conch shell, a flamingo inside a small snow globe, and a toy shark, none of whom can speak because they’re either dead or inanimate.
Milhouse Van Houten
When his family moves because dad Kirk got a job as a non-melting wax statue, Milhouse comes out from under the shadow of his domineering best friend Bart. But before he can say “Everything’s coming up Milhouse!” the poor kid deals with the absence of his pushy friend by cracking up and creating an alter-ego that not only constantly pushes him around but also starts dating Lisa long-distance behind his back.
Evil Monkey
While he might not have been Chris’s actual sidekick in “Family Guy,” the Evil Monkey did spend a lot of time watching him sleep, which is only creepy if you think about it for more than half a second. But now that Evil Monkey has left the Griffin house, he should have his own show that combines “home remodeling” and “home break-in,” by surprising couples with suddenly jumping out of their hall closets, angrily pointing, and shrieking “That living room needs a sectional sofa and recessed lighting! NOW!!!”
Shaggy
With Scooby-Doo a little too old to be running around drafty, abandoned mansions or amusement parks, Shaggy is now on his own, having borrowed the Mystery Machine from Fred and then promptly spacing out on when and where to return it. And so each week Shaggy runs screaming away from ghosts or his own feverish nightmares through strange hallways all by himself, never remembering how he got there, never knowing what he’s supposed to be looking for, and never realizing that a talking dog was actually a hallucination that only he could see.
Pinky
No longer having to help his former cage-mate Brain take over the world, the affable if dimwitted Pinky is free to spend every episode working his way through a maze looking for cheese. And we mean EVERY episode. It’s actually a little sad how he keeps running towards the same dead ends, always giggling but getting weaker despite the fact the scientists have placed well over 100 wedges of Swiss in the maze so he couldn’t go more than three inches without walking into one.
Tigger
No Pooh. No plot. Just thirty minutes of non-stop bouncing, flailing arms, and constantly running around screaming his own name over and over again, sponsored by Red Bull, Mountain Dew, and intravenous espresso.
Who's your favorite cartoon sidekick? Let us know in the comments!
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